Tuesday, March 15, 2011

It's time

It's time to finally face it: I need to lose this pregnancy weight.

Becoming a first-time parent is hard enough, so I didn't put any weight-loss pressure on myself for the first few months. By month five or six, I figured the baby was still young enough that I could get away with not caring. By month eight, it was Thanksgiving, and what's the point of trying to lose weight at that time of year?

Rationalize, justify, repeat.

But Lindsey's first birthday is in two days. My baby-weight grace period is over.

Don't get me wrong: I am crazy excited about my baby girl's birthday. It's an amazing milestone, and it will be so fun to celebrate with our families and get those cake-in-the-hair photos. It's just that I'd pictured myself looking... more like ME next to Lindsey in those pics.

That's actually the problem: I still do look like me, but I look like me circa 2002. At that point I was wrapping up college and had moved from Kansas to Florida to Texas within six months. Though it was an exciting time, it was also stressful, uncertain, and often lonely -- and I reacted to every one of those emotions by eating. Whether I was happy or homesick, it called for food. I was the heaviest I'd ever been.

Over the next couple years, I managed to lose about 30 pounds. Now, I realize that every day, people are dealing with true hardships and overcoming serious problems, and I won't minimize that for a second. But people? Losing those 30 pounds is one of the hardest things I've ever done. It sucked pond water. I hated it.

And now, I'm staring down those same damn 30 pounds again.

I know it can be done, I know how to do it, and I know how great I'll feel when it's over. But so far, I just haven't been able to make myself start. I've been eating crap, lying on the couch and hiding behind the baby whenever a camera is around. It's pathetic. I'm using her as my prop to say "See?! I have one of these! That's why I look like this!!"

Enough of that. It's time to stop idly hating what I see in the mirror. I'm ready to put in the work and feel good about myself again.

It's time.

4 comments:

  1. The twins are 4 and I have 40 or 50 lbs to go from the 80 I gained. Please tell me twins get an exponentially longer grace period. I still stress eat!

    ReplyDelete
  2. ugh, i know the feeling! i was all "it'll take the same amount of time to lose the weight as it did to gain it," but 9 months went way too fast. in the meantime, i've learned the wonders of spanx, carefully placed belts, and hands on the hips in photos. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Mary, don't worry- the grace period I was referring to is my own personal, self-imposed one. I'd never presume to tell another mom to lose weight!! I can't even do it myself.

    Hilary, thanks for the support & the photo tip! I'm going to try that.

    ReplyDelete
  4. YOu must be in my mind, this subject has been on my mind more than a lot lately! I've been using the same excuses and putting it off...I recently realized my ten year HS reunion is this summer and dont want to have my extra mom weight when I go to it - not to mention we have a pool in our backyard! I dont want to spend the summer hiding in tshirts and shorts behind Nathan!

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...